全职做大法项目的点滴体会
Sharing on Working Full Time in Dafa Project
悉尼 马駿
Maree from Sydney
尊敬的师父好！同修们好！
Greetings respected Master and fellow practitioners!
从1999年2月得法，到现在已有16年。
I have been cultivating for 16 years since obtaining the Fa in February 1999.
去掉妒忌心，走出对“钱”的执著
Eliminating jealousy and letting go of the attachment towards money
多年来一直很羡慕可以全职做正法项目的学员。觉得自己因为个人家庭和经济情况无法在正法项目中做全职。前几年确实时机未到，家里先生也没同意，自己也有在常人公司该做的、该学习的。
For many years, I have always envied those practitioners who can work on Dafa projects on a full time basis. I felt that due to my own family and financial situation, I was unable to work on Dafa projects on a full time basis. A few years ago, the timing was not quite right and my husband also did not agree. I also had many things to learn and do in the various everyday companies I worked in.
随着家庭的变化和正法形势的推進，我在媒体里有了做兼职正法项目的机会，同时常人公司也同意给我一个兼职的职位。两个拼起来，又有收入，又能照顾家里，同时还能做正法的事。当时一切都很顺理成章。
As my family situation changed and the entire Fa rectification process progressed, I had an opportunity to work for a Dafa media project on a part time basis. At the same time, the company I was working for agreed to convert me to a part time role. The two added together meant I was able to maintain a decent salary as well as have time to look after my children, and also do Dafa work. Everything seemed to flow naturally.
当一切都俱全了，我再也没借口推托了，我的思想上开始了史无前例的波动。突然开始不停的算钱，算开支，算我每天会少多少钱。那几天平时不喜欢管钱的我满脑子充满了钱。自己觉得从来不对钱执着，当时这个隐藏的很深的心明显的暴露出来了。
When all was ready, I had no more excuses, yet my thoughts started doing all sorts of somersaults. Doubts rose in my mind. Suddenly all I could think about was my finances and expenditures and how much less I will be earning each day. For someone who hated planning financially, my thoughts were filled with money. I thought I had no attachment to money, but during that period, this hidden attachment was exposed.
以前走到哪里说出我的公司和职位以及工资收入都自我感觉很好，别人也很羡慕，现在一下子没有了，我怕我工资没有别人高了，地位没有了。表面上对自己和先生说：能为正法项目做才是最高尚的工作，是我的使命，但是我的心还是不停的翻腾，时不时地就会算一下我在常人公司改做兼职后一个月还能拿到多少钱，还要和周围的朋友比一下，觉得自己没有落后太多，心才定下来。
Before, wherever I went, I would proudly talk about where I worked and how much I earned. A lot of people also envied me. Now it is all gone. I was afraid that my salary would not be as high as others around me, as well as losing my so-called social position. On the surface, I convinced myself and my husband that working on a Dafa project was truly a high level job, it is my duty, however, my inner turmoil continued. Every now and then, I would calculate how much I will earn after switching to part time with my existing company, then I would compare that to friends around me. My mind would only calm down after thinking that I didn’t lose out too much.
以前每次读到师父转法轮里提到的名、利，总觉得自己没有太多这方面的东西，现在这些心都起来了，很多思想业力包围着我，使我不停的问自己，我的选择对不对。
Before when reading Master’s Zhuan Falun, wherever fame and self-interest is mentioned, I always feel I don’t have much attachment in this area. Now, all these humanly thoughts and thought karma surrounded me causing me to question myself whether my choice was correct.
当自己的思想不坚定时周围的干扰就多起来了。先生开始不停地在我耳边说，公司上司也在劝我，同事也在劝我不要离开，等等。最后，公司突然改口，不给我兼职了，要做就要全职。假如我坚持要做正法的项目，那就只有辞职了。
Once my own thoughts were not steadfast, more and more interference started. My husband continuously asked me to reconsider; my manager and colleagues were also trying to ask me to stay etc. Finally, my company suddenly changed their offer and said they were unable to convert my position to part time and hence if I wanted to stay I must work full time. If I wanted to work for the Fa rectification project, then obviously, I must resign.
这样一来，一下子我基本没收入了。当时对我的打击很大，我有点想放弃媒体的职位了。后来自己静下心来想了又想，正法已经走到了尾声。我如果每天把放在常人工作上的力气和心思都放在了正法项目上，这可以多救多少人？自己也知道剩下的时间不多了，我心里也很着急，想多做一点正法的事。现在机会来了，我却执著一大堆，一定让师父很失望，也让等待着我的众生很失望。
If this is the case, I would basically have no income. This came as a shock to me and I almost gave up on the media role. Then I calmed down and thought about it. Fa rectification has almost reached the end. If I put the same amount of energy I used in every day work towards a Dafa project, then imagine how many more people I can save. I know there is not much time left and I also wanted to do more Dafa work. Now the opportunity has come, yet I was filled with a pile of attachments. I felt that I have let down Master and all those sentient beings.
最后，咬咬牙，把工作辞了。表面上虽然这么做了，但是执著还在，所以时不时会有同事，朋友，先生，公婆在我面前说某某人涨工资了，某某人被提拔了，把我说的很难受。后来我原来常人公司的上司打电话说替代我的人不行，劝我回去，承诺给我再加薪，满足我所有工作时间的要求，等等，让我的心不得安宁。
In the end, I made the hard decision to resign. On the surface, I let go but my attachment was still there, so I would often hear colleagues, friends and family talking about so-and-so had a wage increase, or so-and-so had a step up. Later my manager from my previous company called asking me to go back because my replacement was not performing. He promised to increase my wage and give me flexible hours etc. This put my mind to turmoil again.
后来，有一次大学法时读到师父转法轮中写的“妒嫉心这个问题很严重，因为它直接牵扯到我们能不能够修圆满的问题。妒嫉心要不去，人所修炼的一切心都变的很脆弱。”（《转法轮》第七讲）。这时我才意识到我这些对名利、钱财的执著是出自于妒忌心。仔细回想，我的妒忌心很重。希望自己比别人好，希望自己的钱比别人多，职位比别人高，这些归根结底都是隐藏的妒忌心。
Once, during group Fa study, I came across “Jealousy” in Master’s Zhuan Falun. Master said, “Jealousy is very serious, because it directly impacts whether we can cultivate to Perfection. If jealousy isn’t eliminated, all the thoughts you’ve cultivated become fragile. ” (Lecture 7, Zhuan Falun). This is when I suddenly realised all my attachment to fame, self-interest and money arose from jealousy. Thinking back, my jealousy is quite strong. I always wanted to be better than others, earn more money than others, have higher position than others. All these attachments come from my hidden attachment of jealousy.
我终于体会到了为什么师父说“妒嫉心要不去是不得正果的，绝对不得正果的”（《转法轮‧第七讲》）。意识到了这一点后，我现在时时刻刻观察我自己的思想，一有妒忌别人的思想出来就有意地去消除它。我悟到自己的显示心，欢喜心，争斗心，不想被别人说的心，都是来源于这个强烈的妒嫉心。我发现当我认识到了这一点，师父帮助我消掉了很多这方面的物质，让我现在心里特别平静，轻松。虽然我经济上比以前紧，但是我发现该是我的不会丢，我们整体的家庭经济在师父的呵护下并没有少多少。只要在法上，路就会越走越宽。做了全职后，每天和同修们在一起工作，学法，和讨论修炼体会，整个工作环境不断的把我向前推。虽然失去了一点钱财，但是我得到的可是修炼上的一个大提高，这也是慈悲伟大的师父精心为弟子安排的，以免不精進的我继续在常人的大染缸里随波逐流，离整体越走越远。
I finally truly understood why Master said “There’s a rule: a person who doesn’t get rid of jealousy while cultivating cannot achieve a True Fruition—he definitely won’t achieve a True Fruition.” (Zhuan Falun). After realising this, I took more notice of my thoughts every minute of the day. As soon as jealous thoughts came up, I would try my best to eliminate it. I realised that my attachment to showing off, being overjoyed, competitiveness and refusing to be criticised, all came from this extremely strong jealousy. I found that when I realised this point, Master helped me to eliminate a lot of these matters from my field and let my heart become calm and carefree. Despite my finances becoming tighter than before, with Master’s help, our overall family income did not decrease too much. As long as we are on the Fa, our paths will become wider as we cultivate. After taking on the Dafa media project full time role, along with other practitioners, we work together, we share cultivation experiences, we study the Fa together… the entire work environment is pushing me forward in my cultivation. Despite losing out financially, what I have gained is much more valuable: a huge leap in my own cultivation. I felt this is our venerable Master’s intricate arrangement for me, to put a halt to my continued drift in the everyday world, moving further and further away from the main cultivation body.
要看到每个同修的闪光点
Seeing the better side of every practitioner
本以为踏入大法项目可以轻松一些，有点退役/度假的感觉，想逃避那种白天繁忙的工作，晚上还要做项目的苦累感。但是不但没有轻松，而且心性考验一关接一关。
At first, I thought doing Dafa work will be easy going. I felt it was a bit like me resigning from my busy day time job and going into a bit of a career break. I was never so wrong. It was not easy at all. One xinxing test followed another.
我加入以后，原来项目组的同修一连走了几个。后来也一直经历着人员的变换。对于人手的流失，我刚开始感觉特别愤怒，争斗心，不平的心都起来了，对他们看法特别大，而且完全不理解为什么会这样。
After I arrived, a few practitioners who were originally working on the project left. We continuously experienced constant staff movement. When faced with losing key staff members, at first I felt extremely angry and agitated and felt it was not fair. I was unable to understand why they would leave.
过了几天想想，这不是对自己的一个考验吗？想在项目里偷懒？没门！碰到什么事情都要向内找，这个做起来真的是剜心透骨，但是如能做到那真是海阔天空。师父说：“大家知道，达到罗汉那个层次，遇到什么事情都不放在心上，常人中的一切事情根本就不放在心上，总是乐呵呵的，吃多大亏也乐呵呵的不在乎。真能做到，你已经达到罗汉初级果位了。”（《转法轮‧第九讲》）
After a few days, I thought to myself: isn’t this all a test? Wanting to be lazy in a project? No way! I must look within myself. This is easy to say but hard to do. But if I can really take a step back, I can see things in a whole new light. Master said in Lecture Nine of Zhuan Falun: You know, when a person reaches the Arhat level he’s not fazed by anything he comes across. He’s not the least bit concerned about any human things and he’s always upbeat. It doesn’t matter how much he loses out, he’s upbeat and doesn’t mind. When you can really do that, then you’ve achieved the initial Arhat Fruition.
静下心来仔细想想每个同修对讲真相的项目都付出了很多。不管他们是为什么离开的，我突然看到了他们每个人的闪光点和无私的付出，大家都来自不同的世界，具有不同的性格，不管性格怎么不一样，每个同修真的都非常好，都有我值得比学比修的地方。有可能他修好的一面已经隔開了，而表露出来的都是要给我修的，要是我没有想偷懒和过轻松日子的心，有可能不会有這麼多人员变动。不管怎样，这又是一个很好的修自己的机会。
After calming down, I thought about it. Every practitioner has done a lot for each truth clarification project they are involved in. It does not matter the reason they left, I suddenly saw each person’s bright side and their selfless contribution to the project. Everyone comes from different worlds and has different personalities. No matter how different their personalities are, each practitioner is truly special. Perhaps much of their well-cultivated self has been placed aside. Much of what they are displaying are used to expose my attachments, so I can improve in my own cultivation. If I didn’t have the attachment to laziness and hoping to have an easy time, then there perhaps won’t be so many staff movements. Whenever things happen, it is always a good opportunity to cultivate myself.
很多事是讲缘分的，有人走，也就有机缘会有人来。所以当碰到突然人员变动时，我就镇定自己，有师在，有法在，没有完成不了的事，只要自己克服求安逸和懒惰的心，一切都会很圆满。
There are many pre-destined relationships. When people leave, there is destined to be people joining. So when suddenly faced with staff movement, I would calm myself down and tell myself that as long as we have Master and Dafa, there is nothing we cannot accomplish. As long as I overcome my laziness, everything will come to fruition.
果然，虽然经历了人员的变动和人手减少，在同修们的努力下报纸的版面反而增加了，效益也变好了。只要在法上，我感觉师父处处在帮我。自己不是专业排版的，很多东西都不会，当面临一个设计要求高的版面，有时会束手无策。慈悲伟大的师父就会把版面图案和构思打入我的脑子里，有时后发正念的时候会出现，有时候炼功时版面的布局会出现在眼前。
Just as expected, despite undergoing staff changes and reduction in staff, under the effort of all practitioners involved in the Dafa media project, we increased our newspaper pages and increased the company’s profit. As long as I am on the Fa, Master is helping me everywhere. For example, design is not my specialty so when faced with a page requiring more aesthetic presentation, I would feel a bit lost. This is when our venerable Master would project the design and artwork into my mind. Sometimes it will come when I am sending forth righteous thoughts and sometimes it would be when I am doing the exercises.
当然自己平时也要多学习多看好的设计。在报社我不停的碰到神奇的事情，比如以前在常人公司里偶尔的机会学了一些不在我职责范围之内的业务，如怎样建立SQL report等，当时抱怨我们IT部门怎么那么懒，把这些东西扔给我们财务部门做，我硬着头皮学了以后，居然现在由于报社需要，居然用上了！我深刻体会到我们在常人中学的东西都是师父安排的，要用在救人上的。
Of course at the same time I still have to improve my technical skills and study large amounts of layout designs. Whilst working on the media project, I continuously come across surprisingly pre-arranged events. Such as, in my previous everyday persons company, I was forced to learn some skills which were not within my responsibility, such as creating SQL reports. At the time, I complained that our IT department was so lazy, they pushed these tasks for our finance department to complete. I had no choice but to learn it. However, I never knew that it would come to use at the newspaper! I truly felt that everything I learnt was pre-arranged by Master.
改掉坏脾气，遇事向内找
Improving my bad temper and looking within myself
几次人员的变动使我发觉了自己的脾气和耐心真的很差。培训新手时完全受不了别人犯同样的错误超过两次，老是责怪别人学得慢，自己没有向内找，看看自己教人的方法是不是有问题，别人能不能接受。师父很慈悲的在一次冲突中让我感受到了自己对别人的态度。
During the few round of staff changes, I truly felt that my temper and patience was extremely poor. Whilst training new starters, I cannot stand the fact that people make the same mistakes more than twice, I was always blaming others for learning too slow and did not look within to assess my own teaching methods. During a conflict, Master compassionately showed me how I treated others.
有一次，报纸文章里的表格出了错，我发现了立即打电话给负责这篇文章的同修。当时心里很着急，本以为同修会和我一样着急，但是他却似乎很平静的对待这件事情，显得毫不在乎。这可把我气得够呛，开始和他争执起来。
Once, there was a mistake in a table in one of the articles. I saw the mistake and immediately called the practitioner who was responsible for this article. At the time I was extremely upset. I thought the practitioner will also be upset, however, he sounded very calm, giving me a feeling that he did not care too much. I became even angrier and started to argue with him.
当时完全没有向内找，更没有注意自己说话的语气。这件事情就这样过去了，我也没有想更多。过了几个月，同样的事情发生在自己的身上，但是这回是反过来的！是我犯了错误，上错了广告，然后销售很不客气的在电话里指责了我。我当时被气得直接就和她吵起来了。心里想，上错广告我已经够难过了，还要这样不饶人。已经错了，有什么办法，大不了补一期呗。还想着，这个版面是查过的，也没查出来呀，又想到现在人手这么紧，我的压力这么大，上错广告也是难免的嘛，等等。这些为自己找借口和不平的念头不停的往外冒，都是向外找。
At the time, I did not look within at all, let alone my tone of speech. This matter passed and I did not think too much of it. After a few months, the same thing happened again but this time the roles were reversed. I was the one who made a mistake by forgetting an advertisement. The salesperson was very straight forward and angrily blamed me on the phone. At the time I was so upset I started to argue with her. I was thinking to myself: I am already very upset that I linked the wrong ad, why is she is so unforgiving. The mistake has already been made, and the newspaper has been published, there’s nothing I can do. At most, we will just run 1 extra week for the client. The pages and ads were checked by a second person, they didn’t realise the mistake either. We are so short staffed at the moment and everyone is new. All the pressure is on me, so it is understandable that I am bound to make some mistakes, etc etc. These upset thoughts, thinking that everything is unfair continued to surface. I was looking outside, not within myself.
挂断了电话我平静下来了，觉得自己完全不像修炼人，居然会生那么大的气，而且毕竟出错在我这里，肯定是我这周学法少了，没注重修自己导致了报纸和这位销售的经济损失。站在销售的角度上想，谈成一个客户多不容易，我应该要用认真的态度珍惜我们报纸上的每一个广告。
After hanging up the phone, I calmed myself down and felt that I was not like a cultivator at all. I cannot believe I reacted with so much anger. In actual fact, I was in the wrong, I was the one who made the mistake. The reason must be that week I didn’t study enough Fa and nor did I cultivate myself well, thus causing financial loss for the newspaper and this salesperson. Looking at things from the salesperson’s point of view, it is not easy to sign an ad booking. I must value every ad on our newspaper.
第二天上班学法交流时，和大家谈到了这件事情，那位销售说：我就是觉得发生错误后你的态度毫不在乎，让我无法接受！我突然觉得这个话怎么这么熟悉？原来，师父很巧妙的把我放到了几个月前被我“训”过的同修的位置上了。这正是我对那个同修说的话，现在轮到别人说我了！我深刻的体会到了之前表格出错的同修是什么感受了。回想师父在《洪吟三‧谁是谁非》里写道：“对的是他，错的是我，争什么。”感谢师父给我这样的机会让我记得碰到任何事情都要站在别人的角度上去想一想，说话要考虑到别人的感受，停止给自己找借口，就是要向内找。
The next day after our weekly Fa study, I shared about this event. The sales involved said, “I cannot accept the fact that after making a mistake, your attitude is so off-handed. It is as if you don’t care.” When she said that, I felt so wronged, yet what she has said sounds exactly like how I felt when I blamed the other practitioner many months ago. Master has arranged events in a way so that I am in his shoes. I recall Master’s poem in <Hong Yin III‧ Who’s right, Who’s wrong>: “‘He’s right, And I’m wrong,’ What’s to dispute?” I truly thank Master creating this opportunity for me to remember that during a dispute, I must look at the matter from the other person’s point of view, always think about other person’s feeling before speaking and stop finding excuses for myself. I must look within myself.
修炼如初
Cultivate as you did at the beginning, and you are sure to succeed
今年参加了纽约法会，真的感觉自己走回修炼中来了。多年来，大学毕业后，忙于工作，结婚，生孩子，个人修炼上落下了很多。我有可能过着很多常人羡慕的日子，但是因为追求这个常人中的美好的生活让我在大染缸里越滑越远。
After attending this year’s New York Fa conference, I truly felt that I have re-joined the cultivation ranks. For many years after graduating from university, I have been busy with my career, marriage and children. I feel I have fallen behind on my cultivation. Perhaps my life was admired by many everyday persons, but due to my pursuit of this perfect everyday life, I slipped further and further within the ordinary world.
表面上做着项目，参加活动，但是很多时候是出于安慰自己，感觉我还在做着三件事呢，我没有落下，活动完了又恢复到常人状态。直到今年去了纽约法会才知道自己其实自从大学毕业，走入社会后，这么多年没有实修，不知不觉自己的思想离一个修炼人的标准越来越远。
On the surface, I did a bit of Dafa projects here and there, I also participated in major Dafa events. Most of the time, it is to make myself feel good that I was still doing the Three Things and that I have not fully fell behind. However, after each Dafa event, I would slip back into my ordinary person’s ways and mindset. This situation lasted until I attended the New York Fa Conference. This was when I realised ever since graduating from Uni and becoming part of the adult society, I did not truly cultivate myself and I have unknowingly, bit by bit, slipped further and further away from the standard of a cultivator.
这个下滑是很微妙的，不容易察覺，但是天长日久，常人的东西多了，就变成一个常人。平时工作是常人环境，家里又是常人多，接触的朋友也是常人，忙于常人的世界时，大法的东西就少了。
This fall is very gradual so it is not easy to detect. However, day by day, year by year, as I became more and more in contact with everyday things, I slowly became an ordinary person. My work environment consisted of ordinary persons, my family had more ordinary persons compared to cultivators, my friends were also ordinary persons. When I was busy with the everyday world, Dafa became less and less prominent in my mind.
我在参与全职做媒体之前，基本不看明慧网，学法也是偶尔看一下书，新经文出来后总是要很久才有时间全部看完，大组学法犯困，炼功也是身体不舒服或者看孩子时实在闲着没事就炼一下，发正念就完全抛在脑后，一天一次已经很不错了。知道自己的状态不好，但是总是不想去面对自己的不足，所以就这样一天一天的混日子。
Before I started working full time for the Dafa media project, I seldom read Minghui or studied the Fa. When Master’s new articles came out, it always took me forever to finish reading it. I was sleepy during group Fa study. I would only do the exercises when I am unwell or when I really had nothing else to do. Sending forth righteous thoughts was something that was last on my list to do, I’d be lucky to do it even once a day. I knew my cultivation was not good at all, but I did not want to face my own shortcomings, so I continued to drift along day by day.
自从2007年，由于读书，工作和家庭，我一直没有参加美国的大型法会，直到今年有机会去了纽约。看到了美国媒体里学员的状态和再次聆听师父讲法，我感觉太惭愧了。与同修交流后，发现同修真的是时时刻刻找自己。只要心里遇到一丝不高兴的情绪，马上向内找，看看自己有什么心要揪出来，去掉。时间不多了，我觉得不能再欺骗自己，对自己和要救度的众生不负责任。
Since 2007 due to my studies, career and family, I was unable to attend any large scaled US Fa conferences, until this year in New York. After seeing the cultivation of US practitioners who worked in media and listening to Master personally teaching the Fa, I felt extremely ashamed of myself. After sharing with other US practitioners, I truly felt that they were looking within themselves with every thought. If they come across the slightest unhappy thought in their mind, they would immediately look within to see what the attachment could be and eliminate it. There is not much time left. I felt that I cannot lie to myself anymore. I must take responsibility for my cultivation and those sentient beings who are waiting for me to save them.
修炼是严肃的，不合格的就是被淘汰。我虽然没有经历中国的大法弟子的生死选择但是海外大法弟子都面临着一个无比巨大的关——安逸之心，这也就是我目前的生死关了。
Cultivation is a very serious matter and those who do not meet the required level will fall behind. Although I did not go through mainland practitioners’ life or death ordeals, but many overseas practitioners like me face a huge attachment – the attachment to comfort and ease. This is basically my current life-death ordeal.
在2015年纽约法会讲法上当师父说：“讲真相，救众生，这就是你要做的，除此之外没有你要做的，这个世界上没有你要做的。你要做的就是这些事情，可是有些人把自己是修炼都放淡了，把常人事情看重了，对你们来讲，那是不是偏离了大法弟子修炼的路啊？”我感觉这句话字字打入我的全身细胞，直到极微观。师父的法再一次唤醒了我！我为等待着我的众生付出了多少？当这一切结束了的那一刻，我能问心无愧的对师父说：我尽力了吗？
During the 2015 New York Fa conference, Master said: “Clarifying the facts and saving sentient beings are what you need to accomplish. There is nothing else for you to accomplish. There is nothing else in this world that you need to accomplish. Those are the things that you need to work toward, and yet some people no longer pay much attention to even their own cultivation, and have instead made a priority of ordinary things. Haven’t you strayed from the path of Dafa disciples’ cultivation, then? (Fa Teaching Given at the 2015 New York Fa Conference). I felt that each word etched itself into the minutest particles of my being. Master’s Fa has once again woken me. How much have I worked towards saving those sentient beings who are waiting for me? When Fa rectification ends, can I face Master and say: I have tried my best”?
最后以师父的洪吟结束我过去一年做项目的心得体会：
Lastly, I would like to finish my sharing with Master’s Hong Yin:
洪吟二‧正念正行
大觉不畏苦
意志金刚铸
生死无执著
坦荡正法路
Righteous Thoughts and Righteous Actions
A Great Enlightened One fears no hardship
Having forged an adamantine will
Free of attachment to living or dying
He walks the path of Fa-rectification
confident and poised
(Hong Ying II)
以上如有不当之处请慈悲指正。
If there is anything inappropriate in my sharing above, please let me know.
谢谢师父，谢谢同修！
Thank you Master, thank you fellow practitioners.