Changing Notions and Looking Inward Unconditionally
Revered Master, fellow practitioners, hello everyone!
It has been three years since I became involved doing ad sales. Looking back, I found that Master has been offering me various opportunities to remove my attachments. Seemingly, each time I was also able to search my inner-self, but it appeared to be conditionally or I was following the formality. Once digging out my short comings, I then focused on finding others' demerits instead of eliminating my own attachments. Hence I lost my chance each time until recently amidst tribulation when I truly changed holistically to realise all conflicts caused by my humanness. Everything was for me to reflect and to cultivate myself, therefore I gained further comprehension in Hong Ying III - Master poem, Hes right, And Im wrong, Whats to dispute? ("Unconditionally look inward") .
Here is the story:
In early April, the
coordinator told me that the
Before departure I asked for a price guide for the ads and I was given the bottom price. It was up to us as to do our best.
With that easy 'up to us'
permission we went to
We set off again on the following Saturday morning. Luckily we signed up a small ad with a jeweller and made an appointment with a western customer. After work, we strengthened our Fa-study, exercises and sending forth righteous thoughts. Master said in "20th Anniversary Fa Teaching: "Ill tell you, for years I have been continually saying that Dafa disciples abilities are tremendous, yet many people dont believe this since those abilities were not allowed to be seen. Under the effect of righteous thoughts, everything around you, as well as you yourself, will undergo changes. Yet you have never thought to give it a try." Yes, Dafa disciples are the main players of the show. Today we shall try our abilities. We were determined to win the deal on site. Early in the morning we set off full of confidence after finishing Fa-study, exercises and sending righteous thoughts. Through negotiations of over an hour we signed up a one-year colored 1/2 page ad, which uplifted us with more confidence. We were determined to conclude deals everyday so as to make up for the loss in the 1st quarter, including our commission and travel cost. Master said in Page 48 of Zhuan Falun:"You can only have such a wish and think about it like that, but it is the Master who actually does these things." Ordinary people also talk about "Succeeding by thoughts". Probably Master knew our wish and helped us in achieving it. From that day onward we basically signed a contract or two every day. We got 8 contracts signed to a value of $13,000 in ten days and our goals were accomplished.
Fellow practitioners were
all very happy for us after we came back to
About half a month later I
accidentally found out that the commission was calculated at the original
policy for contracts signed in
Fortunately I still had a bit of sense left in me, knowing that my heart was moved so much it would be due to my Xinxing issue. At that moment I did not think I'd made any mistake. I thought I had some attachments but the major fault was with the others. I knew my words spoken with a human heart would not produce any good result. Hence I decided to take the natural path and let go of my own attachment first. Yet in my heart I had not let it go, for I had not truly looked into myself, but was still searching outward. Though I had taken the matter lighter as time passed by , the substance still lingered on. I felt passionless about everything, and annoyed by everything and by everyone.
About two months later, I saw the receipt of that commission, which aroused my thought of the incident. At that time I felt quite peaceful at heart. I thought I had let go of my attachment. I should discuss the issue with the coordinator, not for self-interest, as I knew I could not have things obtained through fighting for it. Master said:"...but it is precisely because of your efforts for change that you may obtain karma. Otherwise the issue of committing karma will not exist, and neither will there be the issue of doing good deeds or wrong deeds. When one insists upon doing things this way, one will take advantage of others and do wrong deeds. Accordingly, that is why cultivation practice requires time and time again that one should follow the course of nature since you will harm others with your efforts. If your life does not have something to begin with and you obtain what should belong to another person in society, you will owe that person a debt." (Page 59 of Zhuan Falun) I no longer worried about my personal benefit, but for the healthy development of our media, various aspects of management should be up to the par. I hope such a thing will not occur to others, for it could dampen enthusiasm of the sales people, and is not conducive to the growth of the media in the long run. At this time my thought was still based on "he is at fault". Although I let go of the heart of loss and gain, I still fought for a reason. I spelled out my thoughts to the coordinator who was very pleased and accepted my suggestions.
Afterwards I looked at myself and found that I was not calm when speaking, and was still holding some grievance. I realised that I still had not let go of the human heart completely. Master told us: "He's right. And I'm wrong" (Hong Yin III, "Look within Unconditionally"). Why is it all my fault? Apparently they were at fault. I felt tangled up. My rational side told me that the incident occurred to reflect my attachment so as to cultivate myself, as Master's Fa already spells it out, however my attachment was struggling - "He is also at fault, mainly with him!" Only now did I come to realise that, the rational side sees the substance of the issue, yet the attachments took chances to struggle to avoid being eliminated. Maybe Master sees my poor enlightenment and my heart to elevate. Then the following day, a practitioner was arranged to introduce me to a potential customer. While waiting, unintentionally I spoke with the fellow practitioner about my confusion: Was it really for me to cultivate? ' I asked. The fellow practitioner affirmed calmly: Yes, it is for you to cultivate. It was like a layer of paper window, it was poked through and the attachment was exposed in the broad daylight with nowhere to hide. I felt relieved that a piece of material been removed. It was just like the filth in the bottle had been poured out and the bottle floated up. Master says: "As true practitioners, we should look at issues from a very high level instead of from the perspective of everyday people." (Page 186 of Zhuan Falun)
Over the past three years, I have been experiencing many tribulations, and becoming more mature in the Fa. But it seems that only until today I am able to understand a little bit about how to look inward in cultivation. I felt I could have done better. With this opportunity Id like to truly say sorry to those fellow practitioners who were hurt by my attachments. It was all my fault. I would also like to say thank you to those who have helped me.
Lastly I like to quote a portion of the teaching from LunYu: 'The Buddha Fa' is most profound; among all the theories in the world, it is the most intricate and extraordinary science. In order to explore this domain, humankind must fundamentally change its conventional thinking. Otherwise, the truth of the universe will forever remain a mystery to humankind, and everyday people will forever crawl within the boundary delimited by their own ignorance.
Thank you Master; thank you fellow practitioners.